Back To Real Life


Paul went back to work yesterday and I’m sad. I like him so much and I have loved having him all to myself the past month or so. Since he came home we’ve eaten lots of sushi and visited family and gone to baseball games and put finishing touches on the house and watched movies with the kids.

Some of the best moments this month were watching Paul in the ocean. I know when he comes in after a few hours in the surf, his mind will be calm, he will feel centered and his eyes will look young again.  Plus, it’s just fun to watch him surf. He looks so great out there!

We’ve had a good time. It makes me look forward to retirement.

I took that picture of him when we were at San Elijo last week. How I adore that handsome face!

Our reintegration has been pretty smooth, both as a couple and as a family. It has been much much better than last time. Maybe it is because our expectations have been different or maybe we have established coping skills or maybe the kids are just older, it is probably a little bit of all of that. Whatever the reason, I am grateful and content.

Peace after turmoil, comfort after distress and joy after despair and discouragement; emotions, hard fought for, feel incredible.

I feel whole again.

Interestingly, our awful move actually made the family transition easier. Normally, Paul is the odd man out trying to fit himself into already established schedules and patterns. Because of the move we all found ourselves in the same boat as we adjusted to our new surroundings. Now, I am a long way from calling the move a good thing but that part ended up being positive.

Spring Break is this week. Usually for Spring Break I have the days packed with activities, but the kids need a rest. They’ve worked hard, juggling school and the move and their dad’s return and extracurriculars. They’ve hardly had a minute to breathe since Christmas! Man! I’m proud of them! I think they just need to sit around in front of screens all week.

I haven’t been able to see past Paul’s return for months now. It feels strange to be thinking about the future again. I need to take this time, before school starts again, to make some plans and figure out what direction our little family will go now.

I better get started!

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